The same old problems
Would it surprise you to know that most of us get tripped up by only six problems? While there are mixtures of the six, and each person has their own variations of the problems, most people struggle with the same six issues.
These six common problems are either triggers for other problems, or are reactions to some other negative event. In other words, sometimes these problems are themselves causes of our problems, and other times they are reactions to a previous problem.
Before we name these six problems, take a few minutes to find out whether, and how much of a problem they are for you.
Print out this sheet. Circle the phrases that best describe how you see yourself. If on any particular statement you think, “Sometimes I am, and sometimes I’m not like this,” rephrase the statement to read “More often than not, I …”
| Group 1-A |
Group 1-B |
- I worry about things.
- I fear for the worst.
- I am afraid of many things.
- I get stressed out easily.
- I get caught up in my problems.
|
- I am not easily bothered by things.
- I am relaxed most of the time.
- I am not easily disturbed by events.
- I don’t worry about things that have already happened.
- I adapt easily to new situations.
|
| Group 2-A |
Group 2-B |
- I get angry easily.
- I get irritated easily.
- I get upset easily.
- I am often in a bad mood.
- I lose my temper.
|
- I rarely get irritated.
- I seldom get mad.
- I am not easily annoyed.
- I keep my cool.
- I rarely complain.
|
| Group 3-A |
Group 3-B |
- I often feel blue.
- I dislike myself.
- I am often down in the dumps.
- I have a low opinion of myself.
- I have frequent mood swings.
- I feel desperate.
- I feel that my life lacks direction.
|
- I seldom feel blue.
- I feel comfortable with myself.
- I am very pleased with myself.
|
| Group 4-A |
Group 4-B |
- I am easily intimidated.
- I am afraid that I will do the wrong thing.
- I find it difficult to approach others.
- I am afraid to draw attention to myself.
- I only feel comfortable with friends.
- I stumble over my words.
|
- I am not embarrassed easily.
- I am comfortable in unfamiliar situations.
- I am not bothered by difficult social situations.
- I am able to stand up for myself.
|
| Group 5-A |
Group 5-B |
- I often eat too much.
- I don’t know why I do some of the things I do.
- I do things I later regret.
- I go on binges.
- I love to eat.
|
- I rarely overindulge.
- I easily resist temptations.
- I am able to control my cravings.
- I never spend more than I can afford.
- I never splurge.
|
| Group 6-A |
Group 6-B |
- I panic easily.
- I become overwhelmed by events.
- I feel that I’m unable to deal with things.
- I can’t make up my mind.
- I get overwhelmed by emotions.
|
- I remain calm under pressure.
- I can handle complex problems.
- I know how to cope.
- I readily overcome setbacks.
- I am calm even in tense situations.
|
I’m not going to tell you the names for the problems this week. Go back through the list, and see if you can identify them based on the statements. Next week, I’ll give you the name for each group; you’ll find out how close you are.
In the coming weeks, we’ll look at each of these six issues, and map out some strategies for breaking free of their control.
In the mean time, if after looking at these groups, you recognize a problem that you haven’t been able to overcome, despite your best efforts, email or call me for an appointment.